“sorry, we don’t have any” is de rigeur here

I am seriously pissed off.

I initially told myself that I would not read the latest Harry Potter book until I had actually read all of the books I am halfway through right now. But today I read one too many blogs that mentioned the bloody thing and I caved. Well. I intended to cave. I got myself excited over the prospect thinking “oh well, it will only take me a couple of days to read the thing…” (going via previous experience with the other books) “so what the hell”. Proudly announced to a couple of girlfriends via email that I was going to get the book today and joked “I bet any amounts of money that they won’t have it in stock here anyway” (again – going by previous experience …).

There are no bookshops in the town where I live. If I won Lotto, I’d open my own little independent bookshop here, with lounges to snuggle up and read on, and an espresso coffee machine, and it wouldn’t make any more here but oh wouldn’t it be nice??

So to buy a book, if I want to do it the “normal” way, I have to go to the next town. They have two bookshops. Both of which are in the same chain … Angus and Robertson … (and probably owned by the same guy anyway). They need some fucking competition let me tell you. Because … “oh sorry, we are out of stock. We might have some in at the end of the week”. Wish I had made those bets. My wallet would be a hell of a lot fatter.

So I took myself off to BigW thinking for sure they’d have a copy, and they’re cheaper there too. But what do you think “sorry – we’ve sold out. Come back at the end of the week”.

I hate living in this shithole of a cultural desert (not that I call Harry Potter High Art but it IS a guaranteed good read). I swear to God. No matter what you want to buy, you can never get it … they have to order it in. You’d think they’d order enough copies of HP to get them through but NO … they are too bloody stingy. This happens with everything. And you can guarantee that when somebody says something will be in at the end of the week (whether that be books, music, dvd, furniture … whatever) it will be in at the end of three weeks, or maybe even six. Man it’s not like we’re situated beyond the black stump here. We’re only a few hours from Sydney.

This is how ridiculous a situation it is here. The book’s recommended retail price in Australia is $50. I go to Amazon and there I can get it for USD17.99 … $18.00 + postage via airmail – the quickest way – makes it a cheaper option than buying a $50 book here (the exchange rate is phenomenally good right now). And I would have it in about a week’s time. Of course, I’m over my limit right now on the credit card so can’t do it that way. Maybe later this week.

And why do I call this place a shithole of a cultural desert? The high point of the annual cultural calendar is Beef Week. We have a street parade down our main street – of cattle. This weekend we had the Beaut Ute Parade. Ute being the Australian version of ‘truck’. So a bunch of yobbos (ie “rednecks”) from everywhere descended on our town on the weekend in their hotted up utes, complete with lights and gun racks that shout “we go pig and ‘roo huntin’. Yobbos in their cowboy hats who’s big love are their utes. Who scream YEEHAW and do donuts in their beloved utes. Can you hear me shuddering from over the pond? Yeah and rodeos are big here too.

Square peg in a round hole here? Moi?

Back to books … so what are the ones I’m halfway through? This list is going to be longer than a weekly shopping list lol!

• Coaching the Artist Within – Eric Maisel
• Fearless Creating – Eric Maisel
• The Teachings of Don Juan: A Yaqui Way of Knowledge – Carlos Castaneda
• Poetical Works of Matthew Arnold
• The Birth of Tragedy – Nietzsche
• The Gate to Women’s Country – Sheri Tepper (Feminist fantasy with a reworking of the Greek tragedy ‘The Trojan Women’ – good stuff)
• Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance – Robert Pirsig

Those are the ones on my coffee table. Now for the ones on my bedside table.

• Picnic at Hanging Rock – Joan Lindsay
• On the Road – Jack Kerouac
• Moreta, Dragonlady of Pern – Anne McCaffrey (read a million times before and will re-read a million times again – the Dragons of Pern being a brilliant series – maybe I should put this one back for now lol!)
• Ballerina – Vicki Baum
• Reading Lolita in Tehran – Azar Nafisi (non-fiction)
• Tennyson
• The Foundation Stone – Rudolf Steiner
• The Crisis of Islam – Holy War and Unholy Terror
• The Inheritance of Loss – Kiran Desai
• The Silver Chalice – Thomas Costain

And the ones I haven’t started yet:

• The second Carlos Castaneda book – whatever it is called (both of these are my fathers so I have to read them and get them back)
• He’ll Be OK. Growing Gorgeous Boys Into Good Men – Celia Lashlie (something my parents have told me I should read and loaned to me)
• The Swiss Family Robinson – this one I picked up at the Tip Shop (the shop of “recycled” stuff at the local garbage dump – a wonderful place to find old books). This copy is quite old – so old it is not dated. Its pages are thick enough to be nearly card, the printed (unjacketed) cover is distinctly Art Nouveau, and it has an illustration by Arthur Dixon in it. So I’m guessing it’s quite old.
• JRR Tolkien – Architect of Middle Earth – A biography by Daniel Grotta with the most beautiful illustrations – a gift I haven’t read yet.
• The Last Nizam – John Zubrzycki – another gift.
• The Death of Merlin – Walter Johannes Stein (non-fiction)
• The Wisdom of Fairy Tales – Rudolf Meyer (non-fiction)
• Isolde – Rosalind Miles – more feminist fantasy
• A Perfect Evil – Alex Kava – some thriller thing that somebody gave me as a gift today (groan – like I need another book)

So … if I waited until I had finished everything like I said, I wouldn’t be reading HP7 until 2010 at the earliest. At which time there wouldn’t be a problem getting a copy I’m sure.

I’m not pissed off now, just seriously embarrassed over my reading habits …

YEEHAW. Snort.