It is clear I have been on the wrong antidepressant all these years. It is clear that the old ones (cipramil) were doing me no favours at ALL and in fact, may have been having a negative effect on me. Things got worse as I raised the dose, I think. Or at the very least, did not get better.
I think I have finally found the right one. I saw a psychiatrist who prescribed aropax, because it deals much better with anxiety than the former. It is also for people with PTSD, OCD and social phobias. Whereas the other was mainly only for depression.I had to come off the others half a tablet a day, have none one day, and then start the apropax. Getting off the old ones, I did have some of the old anxiety ‘attacks’ for no reason, but they have gone again now I’m on apropax. And guess what? I feel NORMAL. Just plain old normal, which after the past two years, is SUCH relief, nearly a miracle. I am not wanting to sleep all day and all night now. I am finally having a good nights sleep, and have energy during the day. My head is still feeling a bit foggy and out there, but I have only been taking these things one week so still have time to adjust to them.
I went to see my counsellor yesterday (in Australia there is a big difference between psychiatrists and psychologists … pyschiatrists prescribe, psychologists do the therapy). I had nothing I needed to talk about. There are still issues, of course there are, everyone has them and there always will be I guess. But I’m handling them now. And I feel at peace with myself.
WHAT a relief.
I think I will really be able to start tackling uni again next semester (film class … YAY!). I am feeling, instead of paused, as if I’ve hit a turn around, and it’s starting afresh from here. I am at the stage where, instead of battling trying to just deal with my emotions, I want to explore my values and start living my life according to them. Moving forward.
I’ve been attending hydrotherapy and light exercise classes for women who’ve had breast cancer surgery. I’ve been volunteering in Liam’s class doing guided reading with each child individually (I LOVE watching the children learn, I LOVE helping children read!). Slowly starting to re-engage.
Life is good 🙂
I’m so glad to read you are feeling good!!!
🙂
Hey Julia 🙂
I have finally caught up. I’m glad I found you on a positive post – I will start reading through ‘you’ now I’m here!
Yeah, the positive posts have been very few and far between I guess. Nice to ‘see’ you again Andria!
Sorry girls, maybe it was a false alarm, or maybe I’ve just had a ‘blip’ as I’m adjusting. A sad couple of days these last two.
I am glad the medicine is working for you. So happy that you are thinking of starting classes back next semester and getting back to exercise.
Sounds like you are getting back to you. That is wonderful.