Scoleciphobia – that is the term for a fear of worms.
I am scared of worms. Yes – I’m out and I’m proud. It sounds bizarre and a tad wimpy, but there you have it. It’s irrational – I know they can’t hurt you, but … just typing this makes shudders go up and down my spine and much head shaking and brrrrrrrrr’s being vocalized. I know they are good for the environment and all and I respect that. But don’t expect me to do any gardening.
How it started I don’t know. But I remember being horrified as a child when someone told me that holes in apples meant worms. From that moment I would not eat applies if they had holes in them. One day, however, my vigilence slipped. I remember it clearly. I was at a school athletics carnival – I was only in primary school. I was thirsty and hungry and my mother gave me an apple. I started to eat it. Wouldn’t you know it. Murphy’s Law. I take a bite, look down at my apple, and there is half a worm frenetically wriggling … sticking out of the place I just bit out of. 
Guess where the other half was?
brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
I didn’t eat apples for years aftewards. I am not kidding. I still inspect apples for holes.
But it’s earthworms I really really don’t like. I cannot stand them. You can’t tell which end is which, they bbbbbbbbbbbbbrrrrrr are transparent half of the time, and they squirm. I do no’t like the way they move. I do not like the way they look. I do not like them Sam I Am.
I used to run cross country. I enjoyed running long distance, and enjoyed cross country races. I was good at it. And it was the only sporting thing I was any good at to tell the truth 
I wasn’t outstanding but I always made it to inter-school carnivals. Why am I telling you this in regards to worms? Because once I had a nightmare.
I dreamt I was running a cross country race in high school. I was running up a hill and then I was alongside the quarry hole. The quarry hole that I wrote about in my ‘cowshit’ blog. The ‘bottomless’ one that was filled with water. As I ran I looked into the hole to find it was not filled with water, but was now a pit full of worms (think snakes and Indiana Jones). HORROR! And the fence that surrounded the ‘pit’ was gone. Of course I became filled with anxiety and that awful thing that happens in dreams happened – where you can’t run. Where your legs won’t move or they move as if they are in molasses. And these weren’t proper earthworm-sized worms. These were DUNE sized worms. Well maybe not Dune sized exactly because they wouldn’t fit but they were BIG fuckers. BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. I think I woke up as I fell in.
bbrrrrr
And now I have a four year old boy. Anyone who has either had the delight of bringing up little boys or has been a little boy will tell you – at this age, bugs are a boys best friend. Boys delight in picking up all sorts of creepy crawlies and stating “this grasshopper is my best friend” (or whatever bug they have found). We had a stash of dead Christmas Beetles in a tupperware container in his room for months. He was convinced they would come back to life. I had to add water to aid the process 
because that’s how you bring things back to life …. “just add water”
But I digress. Along with the fascination with bugs, comes a love for worms. Now Liam is well versed in Mummy’s fear of worms. And usually he keeps them well away from me and knows NOT to bring them in the house under any circumstances. But one day his little heart could not resist and he snuck one in. I found it next to his bed, on his bedside table. In a cup. brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
And as for snakes … as far as I am concerned snakes are just big worms with TEETH.
I need a valium now